Someone sent you this
You’ve been asked to take the Survey, and you’re not sure why.
Reasonable. Here is the honest version, written for the person who did not suggest it.
It isn’t an accusation
Somebody you live with wants to write down what the two of you have already agreed.
That can land as “I don’t trust you” or “you think something’s wrong.” Neither is what it is.
The version that is actually true: every couple is already operating under an agreement nobody wrote down. Who handles money. Who apologises first. What happens when one of you needs to leave the room. You each assumed a version. The difference stays invisible until it doesn’t.
Writing it down is not a suspicion. It is a preference for precision about something that matters.
What it will not do
Worth saying before anything else, because most of the objection lives here.
We won’t tell you your odds. No compatibility score. No percentage. No verdict. No consumer product can honestly give you one, and the ones that do are guessing with a confident font.
Help is never behind a payment. Get help now is free at every tier, including signed out, including people who will never pay us anything. It stores nothing — no account, no cookie, no record that you were there.
We won’t keep you here. No streaks. No notifications designed to pull you back. A product about your relationship that competes for your attention with your relationship has already failed.
We won’t flatter you. Your profile includes what your pattern costs the person living with it. A reading that only flatters you is a horoscope.
And your answers are yours. Once you have both finished, they see your archetype and where you sit on each dimension, in the combined report, and never your answers.
The full list of what it refuses to doWhat it asks of you
Forty-eight statements. About twelve minutes. Answered separately, on purpose, so neither of you edits in response to the other.
You get a full profile whether or not either of you ever pays for anything. It will tell you what your pattern costs the person living with it, which is not always comfortable reading.
That is the whole ask. Everything after it is optional and needs both of you to want it.
The reason it is worth twelve minutes
There is a specific thing many couples in England and Wales are wrong about, and it is not romantic.
There is no such thing as a common law marriage. In 2019 the British Social Attitudes Survey found 46% of adults in England and Wales believed there was — 55% in households with children. In 2005 it was 47%. Fourteen years, no movement.
Living together, however long, creates no automatic right to each other’s property on separation and no automatic inheritance on death.
Work in the home and childcare do not count towards an interest in a property owned by the other person.
Source: NatCen Social Research, 22 January 2019 (British Social Attitudes 2019); cited in House of Commons Women and Equalities Committee, “The rights of cohabiting partners”, HC 92 (2022–23), paragraph 16.
The full picture, with citationsIf you still don’t want to
Then don’t.
This only works if both people want it, and a relationship agreement one person was talked into is worse than none. We would rather you said no now.
If you want to look without committing to anything: the fifteen platform clauses that can be suggested are readable here in full, free, without an account. The app library has 64 browseable records. One book clause is held for specialist review and is not shown there.